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The Gunfighter
A Cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night recognized an elderly man
> standing at the bar who, in his day, had the reputation of being the
> fastest gun in the West.
>
> The young cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and
> told him the story of his great ambition.
'Do you think you could give me some tips?' he asked.
>
> The old man looked him up and down and said, 'Well, for one thing, you're
> wearing your gun too high, tie the holster a little lower down on your leg.'
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
> 'Sure will,'replied the old-timer.
>
> The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the
> bow tie off the piano player.
> 'That's terrific!' said the hot shot. 'Got any more tips for me?'
>
> 'Yep,' said the old man. 'Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer
> hits it, that'll give you a smoother draw'
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the younger man.
> 'You bet it will,' said the old-timer.
>
> The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in
> a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the piano player.
> 'Wow!' exclaimed the cowboy 'I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?'
>
> The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. 'See that
> axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it.'
> The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the
> barrel of his gun.
> 'No,' said the old-timer, 'I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all.'
>
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
>
> 'No,' said the old-timer, 'but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano,
> he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much.
> standing at the bar who, in his day, had the reputation of being the
> fastest gun in the West.
>
> The young cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and
> told him the story of his great ambition.
'Do you think you could give me some tips?' he asked.
>
> The old man looked him up and down and said, 'Well, for one thing, you're
> wearing your gun too high, tie the holster a little lower down on your leg.'
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
> 'Sure will,'replied the old-timer.
>
> The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the
> bow tie off the piano player.
> 'That's terrific!' said the hot shot. 'Got any more tips for me?'
>
> 'Yep,' said the old man. 'Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer
> hits it, that'll give you a smoother draw'
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the younger man.
> 'You bet it will,' said the old-timer.
>
> The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in
> a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the piano player.
> 'Wow!' exclaimed the cowboy 'I'm learnin' somethin' here. Got any more tips?'
>
> The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. 'See that
> axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it.'
> The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the
> barrel of his gun.
> 'No,' said the old-timer, 'I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all.'
>
> 'Will that make me a better gunfighter?' asked the young man.
>
> 'No,' said the old-timer, 'but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the piano,
> he's gonna shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much.