Xzessperated
07-05-2008, 05:42 AM
The following was sent to me in an email and I can not say if the cases mentioned are ridgie didge (true or genuine) or not but if they are then what else can we do but laugh at the law. Who would want to go into business if these examples are true?
The email tells the real surnames of the people but not wanting to end up in court for causing some of these a$$holes some mental anguish I change the surnames to *****.
Stella Awards
It's time once again to review the winners of the annual 'Stella Awards.'
The 'Stella Awards' are named after 81-year-old Stella ******* who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in New Mexico). That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous and ridiculous, yet successful, lawsuits in the United States.
Here are this year's winners:
7th Place
Kathleen ********* of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000
by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle when she tripped over a
toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the
store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering that the
misbehaving little toddler was Ms. *********'s son.
****************
6th Place
Nineteen-year-old Carl ****** of Los Angeles won $74,000
and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda
Accord. Mr. ****** apparently didn't notice there was someone at the
wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbours hubcaps.
*******************
5th Place
Terrence ******* of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a
house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not
able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The
family was on vacation, so Mr. ******* found himself locked in the
garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a
large bag of dry dog food. He sued the home owners' insurance company,
claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed
to the tune of $500,000. In my opinion, this is SO outrageous that it
should have been 2nd Place.
********************
4th Place
Jerry ******** of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded
$14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his
next-door neighbours beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owners'
fenced yard. The award was less than originally sought, because the jury
felt that the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr. ******** who had climbed over the fence into the yard and was
shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
*****************************
3rd Place
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber
****** of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
drink and broke her coccyx (tail bone). The beverage was on the floor
because Ms. ****** had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier
during an argument.
***************************
2nd Place
Kara ****** of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the
owner of a night club in a neighbouring city when she fell from the
bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This
occurred while Ms. ****** was trying to sneak through the window in the
ladies' room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded
$12,000 and dental expenses.
****************
1st Place (drum roll, please)
This year's runaway winner was Mrs. Merv ********* of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mrs. ********* purchased a brand-new, 32-foot-long Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home from an OU football game -- having driven onto the freeway -- she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mrs.********* sued Winnebago for not advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually do that. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually
changed its manuals on the basis of this law suit, just in case there
were any other complete morons around.
The email tells the real surnames of the people but not wanting to end up in court for causing some of these a$$holes some mental anguish I change the surnames to *****.
Stella Awards
It's time once again to review the winners of the annual 'Stella Awards.'
The 'Stella Awards' are named after 81-year-old Stella ******* who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonald's (in New Mexico). That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most frivolous and ridiculous, yet successful, lawsuits in the United States.
Here are this year's winners:
7th Place
Kathleen ********* of Austin, Texas, was awarded $80,000
by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle when she tripped over a
toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the
store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering that the
misbehaving little toddler was Ms. *********'s son.
****************
6th Place
Nineteen-year-old Carl ****** of Los Angeles won $74,000
and medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda
Accord. Mr. ****** apparently didn't notice there was someone at the
wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbours hubcaps.
*******************
5th Place
Terrence ******* of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a
house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not
able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was
malfunctioning. He couldn't re-enter the house because the door
connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The
family was on vacation, so Mr. ******* found himself locked in the
garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a
large bag of dry dog food. He sued the home owners' insurance company,
claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed
to the tune of $500,000. In my opinion, this is SO outrageous that it
should have been 2nd Place.
********************
4th Place
Jerry ******** of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded
$14,500 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his
next-door neighbours beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owners'
fenced yard. The award was less than originally sought, because the jury
felt that the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by
Mr. ******** who had climbed over the fence into the yard and was
shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.
*****************************
3rd Place
A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber
****** of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft
drink and broke her coccyx (tail bone). The beverage was on the floor
because Ms. ****** had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier
during an argument.
***************************
2nd Place
Kara ****** of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the
owner of a night club in a neighbouring city when she fell from the
bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This
occurred while Ms. ****** was trying to sneak through the window in the
ladies' room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded
$12,000 and dental expenses.
****************
1st Place (drum roll, please)
This year's runaway winner was Mrs. Merv ********* of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mrs. ********* purchased a brand-new, 32-foot-long Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home from an OU football game -- having driven onto the freeway -- she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go into the back to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mrs.********* sued Winnebago for not advising her in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually do that. The jury awarded her $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually
changed its manuals on the basis of this law suit, just in case there
were any other complete morons around.