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View Full Version : Kiwi: Paddy, Daz &Scott you will love it



andym
06-26-2008, 06:56 AM
Two New Zealand businessmen in Auckland were sitting down for a
break in their soon-to-be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few
shelves set up.

One said to the other, 'I bet any minute now some idiot tourist is going
to walk by, put his face to the window, and ask what we're selling.'

No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious
Aussie walked to the window, had a peek, and in a thick Oz accent
asked 'Mate, what are you selling here?'

One of the men replied sarcastically, 'We're selling arseholes.'

Without skipping a beat, the Australian said, 'You're doing very well
then..... only two left!'

Xzessperated
06-26-2008, 02:59 PM
LOL. And no sheep in a kiwi joke.

Here is one for you Andy...

One day a Scotsman who had been stranded on a deserted island for over 10
years, saw a speck on the horizon. He thought to himself, 'It's certainly
not a ship.' And, the speck got closer and closer, he began
to rule out the possibilities of a small boat and even a raft.
Suddenly there emerged from the surf a wet-suited black clad figure.
Putting aside the scuba gear, there stood a drop-dead gorgeous blonde!
The glamorous blonde strode up to the stunned Scotsman and said to him,
'Tell me, how long has it been since you've had a good cigar. ''Ten years,'
replied the amazed Scotsman.
With that, she reached over and unzipped a waterproof pocket on the left
sleeve of her wetsuit and pulled out a fresh package of cigars. He takes
one, lights it, and takes a long drag. 'Ach no,' said the man, 'that is
so good I'd almost forgotten how great a smoke can be!'
And how long has it been since you've had a drop of good Scotch Whisky?'
asked the blonde. Trembling, the castaway replied, 'Ten years.' Hearing
that, the blonde reaches over to her right sleeve, unzips a pocket there
and removes a flask and hands it to him. He opened the flask and took a long drink
''Tis nectar of the gods!' stated the Scotsman. 'Tis truly fantastic!!!'
At this point the gorgeous blonde started to slowly unzip the long front
of her wet suit, right down the middle. She looked at the trembling man and
asked, 'and how long has it been since you played around?'
With tears in his eyes, the Scotsman fell to his knees and sobbed,
J****, Mary, and Joseph! And The Wee Donkey! Don't tell me that you've got golf
clubs in there, too!

Flying Scotsman
07-03-2008, 11:24 AM
Well Paddy, that is a cracker. The Scots have their priorities in the proper order. If it had been an Aussie the first item would have been an around the world air ticket, the second a can of beer and the third 5 cases of beer and a shag thrown in at the end .

Douggie

Xzessperated
07-03-2008, 03:01 PM
Well Paddy, that is a cracker. The Scots have their priorities in the proper order. If it had been an Aussie the first item would have been an around the world air ticket, the second a can of beer and the third 5 cases of beer and a shag thrown in at the end .

Douggie

LOL. I was hoping you would enjoy that Douggie. I must admit I was not prepared for the joke to end that way. I had to wipe a few tears from my eyes after reading that one.

andym
07-03-2008, 11:48 PM
We do not need thee air tickets, Boats , Booze and Big BooBs is all that we require>>>>

Xzessperated
07-03-2008, 11:55 PM
We do not need thee air tickets, Boats , Booze and Big BooBs is all that we require>>>>

:iagree: Correct Andy.
Good to see you back. Missed you this week. I guess you have been fixing that pickle. Better send it to me to fix if you are going to trash it. Nah don't do that I would overpower it and put about 10s in it and well you know the rest....

andym
07-04-2008, 01:25 AM
Yeah Paddy I have been busy making a CF all in one motor mount- battery tray for the DF. Have obtained through my nafarious ways a lot more of the CF I sent you. Give us a call if you need some. The motor , battery mount came up real trick.

Scott T
07-04-2008, 03:01 AM
He he, good jokes lads!

andym
07-04-2008, 03:10 AM
Scott are you racing in the big event this weekend?

Scott T
07-04-2008, 04:14 AM
Yeah Andy, running 5 classes with 4 boats - goinmg to be busy!! :rockon2:

I posted some pics from today's practice in the "RC Club Info" section.

Cheers,
Scott

andym
07-04-2008, 04:55 AM
You go bloke. best of luck

Flying Scotsman
07-05-2008, 12:02 AM
Well, you bunch of TWITS, It is time to go out racing and then tell the lads how you fu..ked up after at least 10 cans of the holy nectar. Keep us posted.
Your servant Dolly...Woops ...Douggie